Senior Citizens

Hi ah,....

Hummm let me think ,...why did I post this......don't tell me it's coming to me.....
Oh ya.....

Senior citizens are constantly being criticized for every conceivable deficiency of the modern world, real or imaginary. We know we take responsibility for all we have done and do not blame others.

HOWEVER, upon reflection, we would like to point out that it was NOT the senior citizens who took:

The melody out of music,
The pride out of appearance,
The courtesy out of driving,
The romance out of love,
The commitment out of marriage,
The responsibility out of parenthood,
The togetherness out of the family,
The learning out of education,
The service out of patriotism,
The Golden Rule from rulers,
The nativity scene out of cities,
The civility out of behavior,
The refinement out of language,
The dedication out of employment,
The prudence out of spending,
The ambition out of achievement, or,
God out of government and school.

And we certainly are NOT the ones who eliminated patience and tolerance from personal relationships and interactions with others!!

And, we do understand the meaning of patriotism, and remember those who have fought and died for our country.

Does anyone under the age of 50 know the lyrics to the Star Spangled Banner? or O Canada


Just look at the Seniors with tears in their eyes and pride in their hearts as they stand at attention, on veterans day and our great country's birthday .


YES, I'M ALMOST A SENIOR CITIZEN!

I'm the life of the party...... even if it lasts until 8 p.m.
I'm very good at opening childproof caps... with a hammer.
I'm usually interested in going home before I get to where I am going.
I'm awake many hours before my body allows me to get up.
I'm smiling all the time because I can't hear a thing you're saying.
I'm very good at telling stories; over and over and over and over...
I'm aware that other people's grandchildren are not nearly as cute as mine.
I'm so cared for --- long term care, eye care, private care, dental care.



I'm not really grouchy,

I just don't like traffic, waiting, crowds, lawyers, loud music, unruly kids, Jenny Craig and Toyota commercials, barking dogs, politicians and a few other things I can't seem to remember right now.

I'm sure everything I can't find is in a safe secure place, somewhere.
I'm wrinkled, saggy, lumpy, and that's just my left leg.
I'm having trouble remembering simple words like.......
I'm beginning to realize that aging is not for wimps.
I'm sure they are making adults much younger these days, and when did they let kids become policemen?
I'm wondering, if you're only as old as you feel, how could I be alive at 150?
And, how can my kids be older than I feel sometimes?

I'm a walking storeroom of facts..... I've just lost the key to the storeroom door.


Yes, I'm almost a SENIOR CITIZEN and I think I am having the time of my life!

One Per Point

We are out there this weekend celebrating and remembering our troops, family, friends and lets not forget the recent students who graduated. This one goes out to them for the hard work they have done over the years and now that they have graduated the Real work will begin soon. I hope you enjoy this one.

One day a professor was giving a big test to his students. He handed out all of the tests and went back to his desk to wait. Once the test was over, the students all handed the tests back in.

The professor noticed that one of the students had attached a $100 bill to his test with a note saying "A dollar per point."

The next day the class was back, the professor handed the tests back out.

This student got back his test and $64 change.

The Marine

In lieu of all the things that have happened in this world ,when Jesus sent the Holy Spirit to the disciples or even my fifty-second birthday I wanted to focus on Memorial Day. This is a tribute to all the soldiers here and in other countries. I will admit I am partial to Marines since my son was a Marine. I hope we can all remember a day when we can thank God and all the soldiers that have given us our freedom.

This is a poem being sent from a Marine to his Dad.

For those who take the time to read it, you'll see a letter
from him to his Dad at the bottom. It makes you truly
thankful for not only the Marines, but also ALL of our troops.


THE MARINE


We all came together,
Both young and old
to fight for our freedom,
To stand and be bold.


In the midst of all evil,
We stand our ground,
and we protect our country
from all terror around.




Peace and not war,
Is what some people say.
But I'll give my life,
So you can live the American way





I give you the right
to talk of your peace.
To stand in your groups,
and protest in our streets.




But still I fight on,
I don't bitch, I don't whine.
I'm just one of the people
Who is doing your time.



I'm harder than nails,
Stronger than any machine.
I'm the immortal soldier;
I'm an U.S. MARINE!


So stand in my shoes,
and leave from your home.
Fight for the people who hate you,
With the protests they've shown.


Fight for the stranger,
Fight for the young.
So they all may have,
The greatest freedom you've won.



Fight for the sick,
Fight for the poor
Fight for the cripple,
Who lives next door.

But when your time comes,
do what I've done.
For if you stand up for freedom,
You'll stand when the fight's done.

By: Corporal Aaron M. Gilbert, US Marine Corps
USS SA
Hey Dad,

Do me a favor and label this "The Marine" and tell everyone.
I want this story rolling all over the US; I want every home reading it, every eye seeing it, and every heart to feel it. So can you please spread the word for me? You know what Dad? I wondered what it would be like to truly understand what JFK said in his inaugural speech.

"When the time to lay down my life for my country,
I do not cower from this responsibility. I welcome it."

Well, now I know and I do. Dad, I welcome the opportunity to
do what I do. Even though I have left behind a beautiful wife,
And I will miss the birth of our first born child, I would do it 70
Times over to fight for the place that God has made for my home.
I love you all and I miss you very much. I wish I could be there
When Sandi has our baby, tell her that I love her, and Lord
willing, I will be coming home soon. Give mom a great big hug
from me and give one to yourself too.
Aaron

Please let this marine (and all our military) know we care.
FREEDOM isn't FREE
Someone pays for you and me.

Memorial Weekend

With the holiday weekend upon us, Memorial Day for what the troops have done for us to insure our freedom. I reflect on the simple things this weekend since my birthday is this Sunday. If you are out celebrating this weekend and after all the celebrating you find that you have some cleaning to do check the list to see if something on the list might help. First you need to check out my new BBQ that I got also and am going to be using it to do some cooking first. :)




FREE BBQ Grills.... check out the list of stores......
As every southerner knows it's time to get ready for that all
important cooking technique of the south---outdoor Grilling!
I have found several stores (not just in the south) where you can
get a FREE Bar-B-Q Grill!
You can get a free BBQ grill from any of the
following stores:
A&P
Albertsons
Costco
Dan's
Food Lion
Fry's
Kroger
Macy's
Big Lots
Brookshire's
Lowes
Publix
Safeway
Sam's Club
Target
Vons
Wagner Hardware
Wal-Mart
Winn-Dixie
I especially like the higher rack.....which can be used for keeping
things warm!

If you have this and duct tape, the world is yours.



WD-40
I thought that you might like to know more about this well-known WD-40 product.
When you read the "shower door" part, try it. It's the first thing that has cleaned that spotty shower door. If yours is plastic, it works just as well as glass. It's a miracle!
Then try it on your stovetop... Viola! It's now shinier than it's ever been. You'll be amazed.
The product began from a search for a rust preventative solvent and degreaser to protect missile parts. WD-40 was created in 1953 by three technicians at the San Diego Rocket Chemical Company. Its name comes from the project that was to find a "Water D isplacement" compound.
They were successful with the Fortieth formulation, thus WD-40.
The Corvair Company bought it in bulk to protect their Atlas missile parts.
The workers were so pleased with the product they began smuggling (also known as "shrinkage" or "stealing") it out to use at home.
The executives decided there might be a consumer market for it and put it in aerosol cans. The rest is history. It is a carefully guarded recipe known only to four people. One of them is the "brew master." There are about 2.5 million gallons of the stuff manufactured each year. It gets its distinctive smell from a fragrance that is added to the brew. Ken East (one of the original founders) says there is nothing in WD-40 that would hurt you.
Here are a few of the 1000s of uses:

Protects silver from tarnishing
Cleans and lubricates guitar strings
Gets oil spots off concrete driveways
Gives floors that 'just-waxed' sheen without making it slippery
Keeps flies off cows
Restores and cleans chalkboards
Removes lipstick stains
Loosens stubborn zippers
Untangles jewelry chains
Removes stains from stainless steel sinks
Removes dirt and grime from the barbecue grill
Keeps ceramic/terra cotta garden pots from oxidizing
Removes tomato stains from clothing
Keeps glass shower doors free of water spots
Camouflages scratches in ceramic and marble floors
Keeps scissors working smoothly
Lubricates noisy door hinges on vehicles and doors in homes
Gives a children's play gym slide a shine for a super fast slide
Lubricates gear shift and mower - deck lever for ease of handling on riding mowers
Rids rocking chairs and swings of squeaky noises
Lubricates tracks in sticking home windows and makes them easier to open
Spraying an umbrella stem makes it easier to open and close
Restores and cleans padded leather dashboards and vinyl bumpers
Restores and cleans roof racks on vehicles
Lubricates and stops squeaks in electric fans
Lubricates wheel sprockets on tricycles, wagons and bicycles for easy handling
Lubricates fan belts on washers and dryers and keeps them running smoothly
Keeps rust from forming on saws and saw blades, and other tools
Removes splattered grease on stove
Keeps bathroom mirror from fogging
Lubricates prosthetic limbs
Keeps pigeons off the balcony (they hate the smell)
Removes all traces of duct tape
I have even heard of folks spraying it on their arms, hands, and knees to relieve arthritis pain.
Florida's favorite use was "cleans and removes love bugs from grills and bumpers
The favorite use in the state of New York WD-40 protects the Statue of Liberty from the elements.
WD-40 attracts fish. Spray a LITTLE on live bait or lures and you will be catching the big one in no time. It's a lot cheaper than the chemical attractants that are made for just that purpose. Keep in mind though, using some chemical laced baits or lures for fishing are not allowed in some states.
Keeps away chiggers on the kids
Use it for fire ant bites. It takes the sting away immediately, and stops the itch.
WD-40 is great for removing crayon from walls. Spray on the mark and wipe with a clean rag.
Also, if you've discovered that you have washed and dried a tube of lipstick with a load of laundry, saturate the lipstick spots with WD-40 and re-wash. Presto! Lipstick is gone!
If you sprayed WD-40 on the distributor cap, it would displace the moisture and allow the car to start. (If I knew what a distributor cap was, it might help)
WD-40, long known for its ability to remove leftover tape smunges (sticky label tape), is also a lovely perfume and air freshener! Sprayed liberally on every hinge in the house, it leaves that distinctive clean fresh scent for up to two days!
Seriously though, it removes black scuff marks from the kitchen floor! Use WD-40 for those nasty tar and scuff marks on flooring. It doesn't seem to harm the finish and you won't have to scrub nearly as hard to get them off. Just remember to open some windows if you have a lot of marks.
Bug guts will eat away the finish on your car if not removed quickly! Use WD-40!

"Sorry"

Do you ever wish you could take things back that you might of said to someone? I believe we all have moments in our lives that we regret saying or doing and wanting to say I am sorry. Well I wanted you to meet "Sorry". I hope we can now say that we know sorry and now we can move on with our lives. :) I hope you like Sorry and he makes you have at least have a small smile. :)))

Relaxed, Recharged and ready to Go

Today I dedicate this post to my daughter since Charlise, my granddaughter, and I went to the hill country to relax and recharge. We had so much fun just sitting out on my parents swing and watching Rollie Polie bugs crawl around and curl up in a little ball while we touch them was one of our many activities. Can you tell we didn't do much of anything and it was great. I am also adding a few other photos of my parents and Charlise playing with one of the cats. :) My daughter is a big cat lover and I thought I would post a funny cat picture along with a few photos of Charlise sitting on my dad's tractor mower attachment drinking a juice bag, and a few deer, with our little impromptu picnic of chips, cheese sandwich, and a drink while watching the deer come to the field. I hope you enjoy this as much as we enjoyed our weekend.

Snuffles was finally going to put an end to
the arrogance of those fish in the aquarium.

National Mental Health Day

Now don't get yourself in an uproar about my title. It is to be taken with a grain of salt and with tongue in cheek. There are some days where you say to yourself " Is it me or is everyone a little crazy today." Maybe it is the planned trip with my granddaughter to the hill country this weekend and I am getting a little antsy. My granddaughter just loves going to see her great grandparents and that is what we are looking forward to. Along with going swimming in a small creek that runs on my parents property and riding the 4 wheeler among other things. So today might be my last post until next week and I thought I would put out there this little quiz. I was just thinking if May is Mental Health Awareness Month what does it mean when your birthday is in the same month. It must mean I am unique, special, one of a kind and all those other wonderful things you can think of. :)))) I hope you enjoy it and it puts a smile on your face like it did mine. These are not trick questions. They are straight questions with straight answers.

1. Name the one sport in which neither the spectators nor the participants know the score or the leader until the contest ends.

2. What famous North American landmark is constantly moving backward?

3. Of all vegetables, only two can live to produce on their own for several growing seasons. All other vegetables must be replanted every year. What are the only two perennial vegetables?

4. What fruit has its seeds on the outside?

5. In many liquor stores, you can buy pear brandy, with a real pear inside the bottle. The pear is whole and ripe, and the bottle is genuine; it hasn't been cut in any way. How did the pear get inside the bottle?

6. Only three words in standard English begin with the letters " dw" and they are all common words. Name two of them.

7. There are 14 punctuation marks in English grammar. Can you name at least half of them?

8. Name the only vegetable or fruit that is never sold frozen, canned, processed, cooked, or in any other form except fresh.

9. Name 6 or more things that you can wear on your feet beginning with the letter "S."






















Answers To Quiz:

1. The one sport in which neither the spectators nor the participants know the score or the leader until the contest ends . . Boxing

2. North American landmark constantly moving backward . Niagara Falls (The rim is worn down about two and a half feet each year because of the millions of gallons of water that rush over it every minute.)

3. Only two vegetables that can live to produce on their own for several growing seasons . . Asparagus and rhubarb.

4. The fruit with its seeds on the outside . . Strawberry.

5. How did the pear get inside the brandy bottle? It grew inside the bottle. (The bottles are placed over pear buds when they are small, and are wired in place on the tree. The bottle is left in place for the entire growing season. When the pears are ripe, they are snipped off at the stems.)

6. Three English words beginning with dw Dwarf, dwell and dwindle.

7. Fourteen punctuation marks in English grammar . . Period, comma, colon, semicolon, dash, hyphen, apostrophe, question mark, exclamation point, quotation marks, bracket s, parenthesis, braces, and ellipses.

8. The only vegetable or fruit never sold ! frozen, canned, processed, cooked, or in any other form but fresh Lettuce.

9. Six or more things you can wear on your feet beginning with "s" . Shoes, socks, sandals, sneakers, slippers, skis, skates, snowshoes, stockings, stilts.

PLEASE DO YOUR PART....... Today is National Mental Health Day. You can do your part by remembering to give this quiz to at least one unstable person. This is where you are to smile. :)))

Well, my job's done!...........

LIFE IS A JOURNEY. ROLL DOWN THE WINDOW AND ENJOY THE BREEZE

THATS ALL FOLKS!!!!!

Children's Perception!

Wouldn't it be great to be young again? The innocence of small children just brings a warm feeling and wonderful smile to my face. Kind of like this photo of my granddaughter trying to dress herself. She was so cute trying on her clothes and then ending up with the cutest mismatched clothes on. Oh to be young again...........

1) NUDITY
I was driving with my three young children one warm summer
evening when a woman in the convertible ahead of us stood up
and waved. She was stark naked! As I was reeling from the
shock, I heard my 5-year-old shout from the back seat, "Mom!
That lady isn't wearing a seat belt!"

2) OPINIONS
On the first day of school, a first-grader handed his teacher a
note from his mother. The note read, "The opinions expressed
by this child are not necessarily those of his parents."

3) KETCHUP
A woman was trying hard to get the ketchup out of the jar.
During her struggle the phone rang so she asked her
4-year-old daughter to answer the phone. "Mommy can't
come to the phone to talk to you right now. She's hitting the bottle."

4) MORE NUDITY
A little boy got lost at the YMCA and found himself in the
women's locker room. When he was spotted, the room
burst into shrieks, with ladies grabbing towels and running
for cover. The little boy watched in amazement and then asked,
"What's the matter, haven't you ever seen a little boy before?"

5) POLICE # 1
While taking a routine vandalism report at an elementary school,
I was interrupted by a little girl about 6 years old. Looking up and
down at my uniform, she asked, "Are you a cop?" Yes," I answered
and continued writing the report. "My mother said if I ever needed
help I should ask the police. Is that right? "Yes, that's right," I told her.
"Well, then, "she said as she extended her foot toward me,
"would you please tie my shoe?"

6) POLICE # 2
It was the end of the day when I parked my police van in front of
the station. As I gathered my equipment, my K-9 partner, Jake,
was barking, and I saw a little boy staring in at me "Is that a dog
you got back there?" he asked. "It sure is," I replied. Puzzled,
the boy looked at me and then towards the back of the van.
Finally he said," What'd he do?"

7) ELDERLY
While working for an organization that delivers lunches to
elderly shut-ins, I used to take my 4-year-old daughter on
my afternoon rounds. She was unfailingly intrigued by the
various appliances of old age, particularly the canes,
walkers and wheelchairs. One day I found her staring at a
pair of false teeth soaking in a glass. As I braced myself
for the inevitable barrage of questions, she merely turned
and whispered, "The tooth fairy will never believe this!"

8) DRESS-UP
A little girl was watching her parents dress for a party.
When she saw her dad donning his tuxedo, she warned,
"Daddy, you shouldn't wear that suit." "And why not, darling?"
"You know that it always gives you a headache the next morning"

9) DEATH
While walking along the sidewalk in front of his church, our
minister heard the intoning of a prayer that nearly made his
collar wilt. Apparently, his 5-year-old son and his playmates
had found a dead robin. Feeling that proper burial should be
performed, they had secured a small box and cotton batting,
then dug a hole and made ready for the disposal of the deceased.
The minister's son was chosen to say the appropriate prayers
and with sonorous dignity intoned his version of what he thought
his father always said: "Glory be unto the Faaaather, and unto
the Sonnn, and into the hole he gooooes."

10) SCHOOL
A little girl had just finished her first week of school.
"I'm just wasting my time," she said to her mother .
"I can't read, I can't write and they won't let me talk!"

11) BIBLE
A little boy opened the big family bible. He was
fascinated as he fingered through the old pages.
Suddenly, something fell out of the Bible.
He picked-up the object, it was an old leaf that
had been pressed in between the pages "Mama,
look what I found," the boy called out. "What have
you got there, dear?" With astonishment in the young
boy's voice, he answered, "I think it's Adam's underwear.

Happy IVGLDSW Day!

This one is for all the females in the world. There is always some man that believes his "IVGLDSW" is out there. :)

Today is International Very Good Looking, Damn Smart Woman's Day!
So please let someone you think that fits this description know. No need to let me know as I have already been told from a Very Good Looking, Damn Smart Woman already! And remember this motto to live by: Life should NOT be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in an attractive and well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways, chocolate in one hand, wine in the other, body thoroughly used up, totally worn out and screaming "WOO HOO what a ride!"

Have a wonderful day !

Bran Muffins

Sometimes I think to myself when I read this that the husband is a mild and calmer version of my dad.

The couple was 85 years old, and had been married for sixty years. Though they were far from rich, they managed to get by because they watched their pennies.

Though not young, they were both in very good health, largely due to the wife's insistence on healthy foods and exercise for the last decade.

One day, their good health didn't help when they went on a rare vacation and their plane crashed, sending them off to Heaven.
They reached the pearly gates, and St. Peter escorted them inside. He took them to a beautiful mansion, furnished in gold and fine silks, with a fully stocked kitchen and a waterfall in the master bath. A maid could be seen hanging their favorite clothes in the closet.

They gasped in astonishment when he said, "Welcome to Heaven. This will be your home now."

The old man asked Peter how much all this was going to cost. "Why, nothing," Peter replied, "remember, this is your reward in Heaven."

The old man looked out the window and right there he saw a championship golf course, finer and more beautiful than any ever-built on Earth.

"What are the greens fees?", grumbled the old man.

"This is heaven," St. Peter replied. "You can play for free, every day."


Next they went to the clubhouse and saw the lavish buffet lunch, with every imaginable cuisine laid out before them, from seafood to steaks to exotic deserts, free flowing beverages.

"Don't even ask," said St. Peter to the man "This is Heaven, it is all free for you to enjoy."

The old man looked around and glanced nervously at his wife.

"Well, where are the low fat and low cholesterol foods, and the decaffeinated tea?" he asked.

"That's the best part," St. Peter replied. "You can eat and drink as much as you like of whatever you like, and you will never get fat or sick.

This is Heaven!"

The old man pushed, "No gym to work out at?"

"Not unless you want to," was the answer.

"No testing my sugar or blood pressure or..."

"Never again. All you do here is enjoy yourself."


The old man glared at his wife and said, "You and your bran muffins. We could have been here ten years ago!

How to pull off a Sunday afternoon "quickie"!

The only way to pull off a Sunday afternoon "quickie" with their 8-year old son in the apartment was to send him out on the balcony with a Popsicle and tell him to report on all the neighborhood activities.

He began his commentary as his parents put their plan into operation: "There's a car being towed from the parking lot," he shouted. "An ambulance just drove by!"

"Looks like the Andersons have company, he called out.

"Matt's riding a new bike!"

"Looks like the Sanders are moving!"

"Jason is on his skate board...."

After a few moments he announced, "The Coopers are having sex!!"

Startled, his mother and dad shot up in bed! Dad cautiously called out, How do you know they are having sex?"

" Billy Cooper is standing on his balcony with a Popsicle."

The Best Living Will I've Seen

Now this is my kind of will. :) I hope you enjoy my will.

I, ________, being of sound mind and body, do not wish to be kept alive indefinitely by artificial means. Under no circumstances should my fate be put in the hands of pinhead politicians who couldn't pass ninth-grade biology if their lives depended on it, or lawyers / doctors interested in simply running up the bills. If a reasonable amount of time passes and I fail to ask for at least one of the following:

Glass of wine
chocolate
Margarita
chocolate
Martini
chocolate
Mexican food
chocolate
French fries
chocolate
Pizza
chocolate
ice cream
chocolate
Chocolate
Sex
Chocolate

It should be presumed that I wouldn’t ever get better. When such a determination is reached, I hereby instruct my appointed person and attending physicians to pull the plug, reel in the tubes and call it a day.

Difference between men and women!!

I just cannot help myself but sometimes I just love the little jokes that point out the difference between men and women. Maybe it is a single thing and since I have been single for so long it has turned into me being snarly at times. :)) This is an updated version on the venus and mars thing. I hope you enjoy this one.

1. NAMES

If Laurie, Linda, Elizabeth and Barbara go out for lunch, they will call
each other Laurie, Linda, Elizabeth and Barbara.
If Mark, Chris, Eric and Tom go out, they will affectionately refer to
each other as Fat Boy, Godzilla, Peanut-Head and Scrappy.

2. EATING OUT

When the bill arrives, Mark, Chris, Eric and Tom will each throw in a
$20, even though it's only for $32.50. None of them will have anything
smaller and none will actually admit they want change back.
When the women get their bill, out come the pocket calculators.

3. MONEY

A man will pay $2 for a $1 item he needs.
A woman will pay $1 for a $2 item that she doesn't need, but it's on
sale.

4. BATHROOMS

A man has five items in his bathroom: a toothbrush, shaving cream,
razor, a bar of soap, and a towel from the Marriott.
The average number of items in the typical woman's bathroom is 337. A
man would not be able to identify most of these items.

5. ARGUMENTS

A woman has the last word in any argument.
Anything a man says after that ... is the beginning of a new argument.

6. CATS

Women love cats.
Men say they love cats, but when women aren't looking, men kick cats.

7. FUTURE

A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband.
A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.

8. SUCCESS

A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend.
A successful woman is one who can find such a man.

9. MARRIAGE

A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn't.
A man marries a woman expecting that she won't change, and she does.

10. DRESSING UP

A woman will dress up to go shopping, water the plants, empty the
garbage, answer the phone, read a book, and get the mail.
A man will dress up for weddings and funerals.

11. NATURAL

Men wake up as good-looking as they went to bed.
Women somehow deteriorate during the night.

12. OFFSPRING

Ah, children. A woman knows all about her children. She knows about
dentist appointments and romances, best friends, favourite foods, secret
fears and hopes and dreams.
A man is vaguely aware of some short people living in the house.

13. THOUGHT FOR THE DAY

Any married man should forget his mistakes. There's no use in two
people remembering the same thing.

AND FINALLY...

A couple drove down a country road for several miles, not saying a word.
An earlier discussion had led to an argument and neither of them wanted to
concede their position. As they passed a barnyard of mules, jack asses, and pigs, the husband asked sarcastically,
"Relatives of yours?"
"Yep,” the wife replied, "in-laws.

How Great Is Texas?

IMO I think Texas is one of the best states in the USA. Don't get me wrong I love many states in the USA. I have visited many, maybe not as many as other people, but I always look forward to coming back to Texas after my visits. They say we do things in Texas in a BIG way and this little email that I got just tells you how big we do things in Texas. I hope you enjoy some of the cities in Texas and it brings a smile while you travel in your mind to all the cities. I wanted to add one for thing about the reason I love Texas and that is my little friend that I found in my fig tree in my backyard the other day. He is so cute, tell me the last time you had something that cute in your backyard. :)
Here is a list of actual places to travel in Texas.


Need to be cheered up?

Happy, Texas 79042
Pep, Texas 79353
Smiley, Texas 78159
Paradise, Texas 76073
Rainbow, Texas 76077
Sweet Home, Texas 77987
Comfort, Texas 78013
Friendship, Texas 76530

Love the Sun?

Sun City, Texas 78628
Sunrise, Texas 76661
Sunset, Texas 76270
Sundown, Texas 79372
Sunray, Texas 79086
Sunny Side, Texas 77423

Want something to eat?

Bacon, Texas 76301
Noodle, Texas 79536
Oatmeal, Texas 78605
Turkey, Texas 79261
Trout, Texas 75789
Sugar Land, Texas 77479
Salty, Texas 76567
Rice, Texas 75155
And top it off with:
Sweetwater, Texas 79556


Why travel to other states?
Texas has them all!

Detroit, Texas 75436
Colorado City, Texas 79512
Denver City, Texas 79323
Nevada, Texas 75173
Memphis, Texas 79245
Miami, Texas 79059
Boston, Texas 75570
Santa Fe, Texas 77517
Tennessee Colony, Texas 75861
Reno, Texas 75462

Feel like traveling outside the country?
Don't bother buying a plane ticket!

Athens, Texas 75751
Canadian, Tex as 79014
China, Texas 77613
Egypt, Texas 77436
Turkey, Texas 79261
London, Texas 76854
New London, Texas 75682
Paris, Texas 75460

No need to travel to Washington D.C.

Whitehouse, Texas 75791

We even have a city named after our planet!

Earth, Texas 79031

And a city named after our State!
Texas City, Texas 77590

Exhausted?

Energy, Texas 76452

Cold?

Blanket, Texas 76432

Winters, Texas

Like to read about History?

Santa Anna, Texas

Goliad, Texas

Alamo, Texas

Gun Barrel City , Texas
Need Office Supplies?

Staples, Texas 78670

Men are from Mars, woman are from

Venus, Texas 76084

You guessed it..it's on the state line..

Texline, Texas 79087

For the kids..

Kermit, Texas 79745
Elmo, Texas 75118
Nemo, Texas 76070
Tarzan, Texas 79783
Winnie, Texas 77665
Sylvester, Texas 79560

Other city names in Texas , to make you smile..... :

Frognot, Texas 75424
Bigfoot, Texas 78005
Hogeye, Texas 75423
Cactus, Texas 79013
Notrees, Texas 79759
Best, Texas 76932
Veribest, Texas 76886
Kickapoo, Texas 75763
Dime Box, Texas
Telephone, Texas 75488
Telegraph, Texas 76883
Whiteface, Texas 79379
Twitty, Texas 79079

And last but not least.

The Anti-Al Gore City

Kilgore, Texas 75662

Have a Good Day!

P.S. Whoops, left out
Muleshoe
Cut n Shoot
Gun Barrell City
Hoop And Holler
Ding Dong, and don't forget......
Farewell , Texas

Grandma's Hands

Today I am in a mood that brings back memories of my childhood. My grandparents when they were alive ,on my dad's side of the family, lived about thirty miles from where I grew up. Every sunday after church we would go to see my grandparents. At the time when we would do that being a kid I would complain. Why do we always come up here to see Oma and Opa I would ask? That is what we called my grandparents on my dad's side being German and all. My dad would always say because they are getting old and they won't be around forever they love seeing all of their grandchildren. I am missing those days and when I got this little story from a really good friend it reminded me of my grandmother. I miss her every now and then and when I get things like this it makes me want to go to the country and get out of the big city rat race. One day really soon I am going to take my granddaughter to go see her mema, which is what she calls her great grandma. I look forward to being able to add memories to the memory banks soon. I hope you enjoy the story as much as I did. Oh by the way the photo in todays post is of my daughter and granddaughter in the country last year.

Grandma, some ninety plus years sat feebly on the patio bench. She didn't move, just sat with her head down staring at her hands. When I sat down beside her she didn't acknowledge my presence and the longer I sat I wondered if she was OK. Finally, not really wanting to disturb her but wanting to check on her at the same time, I asked her if she was OK.
She raised her head and looked at me and smiled. "Yes, I'm fine, thank you for asking," she said in a clear strong voice.
"I didn't mean to disturb you, Grandma, but you were just sitting here staring at your hands and I wanted to make sure you were OK," I explained to her.
"Have you ever looked at your hands?" she asked. "I mean really looked at your hands?" I slowly opened my hands and stared down at them. I turned them over, palms up and then palms down. No, I guess I had never really looked at my hands as I tried to figure out the point she was making.
Grandma smiled and related the following story:
Stop and think for a moment about the hands you have, how they have served you well throughout your years.
"These hands, though now wrinkled, shriveled and weak have been the tools I used all my life to reach out and grab and embrace life. They braced and caught my fall when as a toddler I crashed upon the floor. They put food in my mouth and clothes on my back. As a child my mother taught me to fold them in prayer. They tied my shoes and pulled on my boots."
"They held my husband and wiped my tears when he went off to war. They have been dirty, scraped and raw, swollen and bent!"
"They were uneasy and clumsy when I tried to hold my newborn son. Decorated with my wedding band they showed the world that I was married and loved someone special."
"They wrote my letters to him and trembled and shook when I buried my parents and spouse. They have held my children and grandchildren, consoled neighbors, and shook in fists of anger when I didn't understand. They have covered my face, combed my hair, and washed and cleansed the rest of my body."
"They have been sticky and wet, bent and broken, dried and raw. And to this day when not much of anything else of me works real well these hands hold me up, lay me down, and again continue to fold in prayer."
"These hands are the mark of where I've been and the ruggedness of life. More importantly it will be these hands that God will reach out and take when he leads me home. And with my hands He will lift me to His side and there I will use these hands to touch the face of Christ."
I will never look at my own hands the same again. God reached out and took my grandma's hands and led her home. When my hands are hurt or sore or when I stroke the face of my children and husband I think of Grandma. I know the hands of God have held her. And I, too, want to touch the face of God and feel His hands upon my face.

Main Reason To Be Nice To Nurses!!

For everyone who love attorneys.
A big shot attorney had to spend a couple of days in the hospital.
He was a royal pain to the nurses because he bossed them around just
like he did his staff. None of the hospital staff wanted to have anything
to do with him.
The head nurse was the only one who could stand up to him. She
came into his room and announced, "I have to take your temperature."
After complaining for several minutes, he finally settled down,
crossed his arms and opened his mouth.
"No, I'm sorry, the nurse stated,
"but for this reading, I can't use an oral thermometer."
This started another round of complaining, but eventually he
rolled over and bared his behind.
After feeling the nurse insert the thermometer, he heard her announce,
"I have to get something. Now you stay JUST LIKE THAT until I get back!"
She leaves the door to his room open on her way out.
He curses under his breath as he hears people walking past his
door, laughing.
After a half hour, the man's doctor comes into the room.
"What's going on here?" asked the doctor.
Angrily, the man answers, "What's the matter, Doc? Haven't you
ever seen someone having their temperature taken?"
After a pause, the doctor confesses, "Not with a carnation."

Headlines for the Future in the Year 2029

I had a little bird tell me from the great country down under, Australia, to get my brain in gear. I am so glad that there are friends that I have that will put that fire under me to not get into a rut . Here is my funny side of what this country is going to be like if we don't find a way to get back to basics. With my tongue in cheek here are my thoughts on the MSM and what they would print......

Ozone created by electric cars now killing millions in the seventh largest country in the world, Mexifornia, formerly known as California. White minorities still trying to have English recognized as Mexifornia's third language.
Spotted Owl plague threatens northwestern United States crops and livestock.
Baby conceived naturally. Scientists stumped.
Couple petitions court to reinstate heterosexual marriage.
Last remaining Fundamentalist Muslim dies in the AmericanTerritory of the Middle East (formerly known as Iraq, Afghanistan, Syria and Lebanon).
Iran still closed off; physicists estimate it will take at least 10 more years before radioactivity decreases to safe levels.
France pleads for global help after being taken over by Jamaica.
Castro finally dies at age 112; Cuban cigars can now be imported legally, but President Chelsea Clinton has banned all smoking.
George Z. Bush says he will run for President in 2036.
Postal Service raises price of first class stamp to $17.89 and reduces mail delivery to Wednesdays only.
85 year $75.8 billion study: Diet and Exercise is the key to weight loss. Average weight of Americans drops to 250 lbs.
Japanese scientists have created a camera with such a fast shutter speed, they now can photograph a woman with her mouth shut.
Massachusetts executes last remaining conservative.
Supreme Court rules punishment of criminals violates their civil rights.
Average height of NBA players is now nine feet, seven inches.
New federal law requires that all nail clippers, screwdrivers, fly swatters and rolled-up newspapers must be registered by January 2036.
Congress authorizes direct deposit of formerly illegal political contributions to campaign accounts.
IRS sets lowest tax rate at 75 percent.
Florida voters still having trouble with voting machines.

Did you know?

WHICH ARE TRUE OR FALSE???

Can you guess which of the following are true and which are false?

1. Apples, not caffeine, are more efficient at waking you up in the

morning.

2. Alfred Hitchcock didn't have a belly button.

3. A pack-a-day smoker will lose approximately 2 teeth every 10 years.

4. People do not get sick from cold weather; it's from being indoors a

lot more.

5. When you sneeze, all bodily functions stop, even your heart!

6. Only 7 percent of the population are lefties.

7. Forty people are sent to the hospital for dog bites every minute.

8. Babies are born without kneecaps. They don't appear until they are

2-6 years old.

9. The average person over 50 will have spent 5 years waiting in lines.

10. The toothbrush was invented in 1498.

11. The average housefly lives for one month.

12. 40,000 Americans are injured by toilets each year.

13 A coat hanger is 44 inches long when straightened.

14. The average computer user blinks 7 times a minute.

15. Your feet are bigger in the afternoon than any other time of day.

16. Most of us have eaten a spider in our sleep.

17. The REAL reason ostriches stick their head in the sand is to search

for water.

18. The only two animals that can see behind themselves without turning

their heads are the rabbit and the parrot.

19. John Travolta turned down the starring roles in "An Officer and a

Gentleman" and "Tootsie."

20. Michael Jackson owns the rights to the South Carolina State anthem.

21. In most television commercials advertising milk, a mixture of white

paint and a little thinner is used in place of the milk.

22. Prince Charles and Prince William NEVER travel on the same airplane,

just in case there is a crash.

23. The first Harley Davidson motorcycle built in 1903 used a tomato can

for a carburetor.

24. Most hospitals make money by selling the umbilical cords cut from

women who give birth. They are used in vein transplant surgery.

25. Humphrey Bogart was related to Princess Diana. They were 7th

cousins.

26. If coloring weren't added to Coca-Cola, it would be green.

Did you figure out which ones were true? The answer is all of them are true.

I was going through some documents on my computer today to see what stuff I was going to delete to clean up my hard drive. I came across this really good gem of a joke. I love Texas jokes, if there is anything I want to be remembered as is a true Texan. I hope you enjoy this one as much as I did. LOL.


Someone once noted that a Texan can get away with the most awful kind of
insult just as long as it's prefaced with the words, "Bless her heart" or
"Bless his heart." As in, "Bless his heart, if they put his brain on the
head of a pin, it'd roll around like a BB on a 6-lane highway."

I was thinking about this the other day when a friend was telling about
her new transplanted northern friend who was upset because her toddler is
just beginning to talk and he has a Texas accent. My friend, who is very
kind and, bless her heart, cannot do a thing about those thighs of hers,
was justifiably miffed about this. After all, this woman had CHOSEN to
move to Texas a couple of years ago.

"Can you believe it?" said her friend, "A child of mine is going to be
"taaaallllkkin liiiike thiiiissss."

Now, don't get me wrong. Some of my dearest friends are from the North,
bless their hearts. I welcome their perspective, their friendships, and
their recipes for authentic Northern Italian food. I've even gotten past
their endless complaints that you can't find good bread down here. And the
heathens, bless their hearts, don't like cornbread!

I have a friend from Bawston, bless her heart, who thinks it's hilarious
when I say I've got to "carry" my daughter to the doctor or "cut off" the
light. She also gets a giggle every time I am "fixin" to do something.
And, bless their hearts, they don't even know where "over yonder" is, or
what "I reckon" means!

My personal favorite was my aunt, saying, "Bless her heart, she cain't
help being ugly, but she could'uh stayed home."

Texas girls know bad manners when they see them:
1. Drinking straight out of a can.
2. Not sending thank you notes.
3. Velvet after February.
4. White shoes before Memorial Day or after Labor Day.

Texas girls always say:
1. "Yes Maam."
2. "Yessir."

Texas girls have a distinct way with fond expressions:
1. "Yawl come back."
2. "Well, bless yer harrt."
3. "Drop by when ya can."
4. "How's yer mama?"
5. "Love yer hair."

Texas girls know their three R's:
1. Rich
2. Richer
3. Richest

Texas girls know everybody's first name:
1. Hunny
2. Darlin'
3. Shuger

Texas girls know the movies that speak to their hearts:
1. "Gone With the Wind"
2. "Fried Green Tomatoes"
3. "Driving Miss Daisy"
4. "Steel Magnolias"

Texas girls know the three deadly sins:
1. Bad hair
2. Bad manners
3. Bad blind dates

G.R.I.T. = Girls Raised in Texas !

Now you run along, Shuger, and send this to ANY females aspiring to be
GRITS--Even the northern ones, "Bless Their Hearts".

"Just because you move to Texas does not make you a Texan. After all, if
a cat had kittens and moved them to the oven, that wouldn't make them
biscuits."

This is just a follow up to a post I made about questions that linger in my mind. More questions to linger in my mind. I hope you enjoy these as much as I did. LOL.

Questions that haunt me???

Can you cry underwater?

How important does a person have to be before they are considered assassinated instead of just murdered?

Why do you have to “put your two cents in” but it’s only a “penny for your thoughts”? Where’s that extra penny go?

Once you’re in heaven, do you get stuck wearing the clothes you were buried in for eternity?

That brings up the other question what if you get cremated?

Why does a round pizza come in a square box?

What disease did cured ham actually have?

How is it that we put man on the moon before we figured out it would be a good idea to put wheels on luggage?

Why is it that people said they “slept like a baby” when babies wake up like every two hours?

If a deaf person has to go to court, is it still called a hearing?

Why are you IN a movie, but you’re ON TV?

Why do people pay to go up tall buildings and then put money in binoculars to look at things on the ground?

Why do doctors leave the room while you change? They’re going to see you naked anyway?

Why is “bra” singular and “panties” plural?

Why do toasters always have a setting that burns the toast to a horrible crisp, which no decent human being would eat?

If Jimmy cracks corn and no one cares, why is there a stupid song about him?

Can a hearse carrying a corpse drive in the HOV (carpool) lane?

If the professor on Gilligan’s Island can make a radio out of a coconut, then why couldn’t he fix a hole on a boat?

Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours? They’re both dogs!

If Wile E. Coyote had enough money to buy all that ACME crap, why didn’t he just buy dinner?

If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from vegetables, what is baby oil made from?

If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?

Do the Alphabet song and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star have the same tune?

Why did you just try singing the two songs above?

Why do they call it an asteroid when it’s outside the hemisphere, but you call it a hemorrhoid when it’s in your bu$$?

Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog’s face, he gets mad at you, but when you take him for a car ride, he sticks his head out the window?